I was planning to do a January-in-Review post, and I still will, but this is just something that's been on my heart lately so I thought I'd share it.
January was a difficult month for our family. Dad has been on three antibiotics since Christmas, he has had multiple Dr. visits, and Mom has not been doing too well. Her MS has been acting up, so her vision has been blurred and a lot of the time she feels dizzy. And, in the middle of it all, almost everyone came down with a nasty cold. There were days when Faith, dad and I were the only ones who were up and around.
So, yeah. It's definitely not been one of the better months for our family. There were times this past month where I just wanted to go and hide from everything that was going on. Yes, I know it wouldn't have changed anything, but sometimes hiding can just sound so comforting. A way to get away from everything, even if it's only for a moment or two.
Unfortunately, that's not really possible. Even when you do get away, the thoughts and worries are still there.
There's one song that has been a huge blessing to me this month; "Just be Held" by Casting Crowns.
It's easier to stay busy and to not think about it. But even in a house with ten people, there are times when it is quiet, there are times when there is nothing else that needs done.
And that's when all the questions and worries come. That's when I have a choice. I can either do my best to continue in my own strength, which will eventually fail. Of I can turn everything over to God, and trust that He is holding me and my family in everything we're going through.
My favorite line in "Just be Held" is; "When your eyes are on the storm you'll wonder if I love you still, but when your eyes are on the cross you'll know I always have and I always will. And not a tear is wasted, in time you'll understand. I'm painting beauty in the ashes, your life is in my hands".
God is there. Even in the storm, even in the chaos, He is there, and He loves you. He wants what is best for you, and somehow what you're going through is all part of His will. We may not see it. Honestly, I don't really see it yet, but I know that His plan is there, and someday I will see it.
It is hard to trust, but He knows what's best. There is freedom in surrender. Lay down the circumstances you are trying to control and give them to God.
It's not a one-time only thing. You need to keep trusting God through all the trials that come your way. When you see all the pain and confusion, it is easy to wonder if God can possible use any of it for good. He can and He will, just trust. Release your hold, and instead let Him hold you. Jesus loves you. It's a simple truth, but one that can be hard to grasp.
So. . .yeah. This is just some things that have been on my heart this past week.
I will have a "proper" January-review post up sometime later this week. :) I hope you all are having a good week!
I am praying so hard for you and your family, Jesseca. You're constantly on my mind. I will continue to pray you are comforted. Thank you for sharing your struggles to encourage others, that takes a lot of courage. You're a wonderful girl, Jesseca, and a wonderful sister in Christ. <3 Thank you for being such an encouragement to all of us!
ReplyDeleteAwww, thank you, Emily. You all are in our prayers as well! And you're welcome. Every time I write a post like this I get so nervous. So. . .I'm really not that courageous at all. God has to help me quite a bit. :) He's amazing.
DeleteYou're a wonderful, dear sister in Christ as well. <3 And I'm glad God was able to use the post to be an encouragement. :)
I'm with Emily. Our family will be keeping you all in our prayers. Thanks so much for doing this post. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Rebekah. :) Your prayers are such a blessing. And you're welcome. ;)
DeleteThank you for this post, Jesseca. Have you heard the song, "Till the Storm Passes Over"? There have been times when I've wanted to run away and hide too, but, like you said, it wouldn't change anything. But our Father knows the end even when we don't. I'll be praying for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteI have heard that song and I really like it! It's been a while, and as soon as I read your comment all the words came into my mind. It's such an amazing song!!
DeleteYes, it's so true! Thanks for commenting and for praying. It means the world to us! (The praying. ;))
I'll be praying for you all too! Hope everything gets better. I really like Casting Crowns. They have some songs that are...well, very direct. Many of them really speak to me. This post is a real reminder to me too, thank you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Bethany! Yes, Casting Crown's songs will always be among my favorites!
DeleteI'm glad it was able to be a reminder. :)
Thanks for sharing! This post was an encouragement to me! I've been praying for you dad but I will make sure to pray for your entire family as well. :D
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome, Lauren. :) Thank you so much for praying and I'm glad the post encouraged you!
DeleteI can totally relate to the wanting-to-run-and-hide feeling. Sometimes life is just to overwhelming, and that sounds so comforting and inviting. :)
ReplyDeleteI've did the same thing – trying to hide my emotions, put on a smile, and just pretend everything is okay. Even when it really isn't.
I love this song (that's my favorite line too. ;) ). It's so encouraging and real. There's been many times in the past year that I should've gave in, should've just let go. Let God hold me and let Him take control of my situations. But I didn't. I resisted.
"There is freedom in surrender". Yes, there is! God has been teaching me that recently. :)
Thank you so much for sharing what's on your heart, Jesseca! Your family has been on my heart and mind alot lately, even before I knew of your struggling times. Prayers going up for you and yours! :)
(And the title of the post made perfect sense to me. ;) )
Yes, that's so true! It seems like it's easier to control, but when it gets down to it, we don't really control anything. Putting it in God's hands makes it so much easier!
DeleteYou're welcome. :) Tank you so, so much for your prayers!! Hehe, good, I'm glad you liked it. ;)
Thank you, Jesseca.
ReplyDeleteThose words are the ones that I believe God gave you. He does stuff like that :)
Gives you the right words, whether it's for you, for others, or for both! I felt like it was for both of us.
Thanks for being faithful in sharing what God laid on your heart.
You're welcome. Yes, He's so good at that! I'm glad it was able to encourage you. That's God working, I just wrote what He seemed to be urging me to say. :)
DeleteAw Jesseca. I'm sorry to come across your blog at this time! May the Lord bless you and grow you through these difficulties. Hope things improve for you and your family!
ReplyDeleteOh wait, I just realized the date on this post was from about this time LAST year. I certainly hope you are completely over your colds now! :)
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